Blindsided Splash Graphic
 
The Graves
Amelia
Blindsided Box - Crazy On The Outside
Preist Movie Paul Bettany

Directed By - Scott Stewart

PRIEST

Starring - Paul Bettany, Cam Gigandet, Maggie Q & Karl Urban

Date Forgiveness Required - January 14th, 2011.

Directed By - Brian Pulido

THE GRAVES

Starring - Clare Grant, Jillian Murray & Tony Todd

Mistakenly Exhumed - January 29th, 2010

Directed By - Tim Allen

CRAZY ON THE OUTSIDE

Starring - Tim Allen, Sigourney Weaver, Jeanne Tripplehorn & Julie Brown

Released Into Society - January 8th, 2010

Directed By - Mira Nair

AMELIA

Starring - Hilary Swank, Richard Gere & Ewan McGregor

Vanished From Theaters - Late November, 2009 (Exact Date Unknown)

Half Man Half Movie Splash Graphic
Amelia Movie Poster Hilary Swank
Master Navigation Menu Glow Bar
More Than Meets the Eye

During an attempt to circumnavigate the globe, Earhart disappeared over the central Pacific Ocean, on July 2nd, 1937. Over seventy years later, we can clearly see that her ass had been missing for an unknown amount of time prior to that fatal flight.

Amelia's rigid, unnatural posture suggests the onset of rigor mortis. Two-time Oscar winner, Hilary Swank, who is known and respected for taking things too far, accepted the role on the condition that she be allowed to portray Earhart as dead throughout the film.

Amelia 90 Degree Angle Bar


Ass
Elevation

90º

Amelia Ass Arrow
Blindsided
Amelia 90 Degree Angle Bar

Judging by Sigourney Weaver's face, the props people have invented a
form of glass that takes 30 years off anyone standing behind it.

Even if the film tanks, I think the glass will be a huge commercial success.

Crazy On The Outside Movie Poster Sigourney Weaver

I was quite moved when I realized that Tim Allen is actually trying to prevent his fellow actors from being in "another crap Tim Allen movie." And he's directing it.

Robin Williams has never been been this selfless.

Crazy On The Outside B

When the title of a comedy comes in the form of a rubber stamp, it's a kind of guarantee the movie will suck ass. Remember "Accepted" or "Next Day Air"?
Neither do I.

The only known exception to this rule is "Top Secret" (1984).

Sigourney Weaver Close Up
Crazy On The Outside C
Crazy On The Outside A
Hyperlink To Top Of Page
Hyperlink To Top Of Page
The Graves Movie Poster Clare Grant Brian Pulido

If you've ever wondered why distributors use different posters overseas,
take a look at this one-sheet for "The Graves."

The average American catching a glimpse of this
fly-encrusted, head-turner knows the price of
a ticket will buy them 90 minutes of beautiful
teens pouting, whining, screwing and
then being hacked to pieces.

In Third World countries, most people
will assume this young woman has just
"finished a really good meal" and expect a
movie along the lines of "Julia & Julia." When they
discover they're watching a low-budget knock-off of
"The Hills Have Eyes" they may riot, or worst, demand a refund.

IMBD Plot Summary": "A priest disobeys church law to track down the vampires that kidnapped his niece.

Given recent revelations, I'd say there's a 60-70% chance she'll suffer less abuse if she refuses assistance and remains with the vampires.

Preist Movie Poster Paul Bettaby MKarl Urban, Scott Stewart Arrow Down
Preist Movie Poster Paul Bettaby MKarl Urban, Scott Stewart Arrow Down ThePriestArrow Preist Movie Poster Paul Bettaby MKarl Urban, Scott Stewart Arrow Down
Preist Movie Poster Paul Bettaby MKarl Urban, Scott Stewart Arrow Down

Having a huge red cross tattooed on your face is one of those things foster agencies look for. It's a dead giveaway you're "out of your fucking mind" and will probably perform poorly in a parenting role.

Bettany's best shot at retaining custody of his niece will be to claim he is of Maori descent.

Hyperlink To Top Of Page
Crazy On The Outside A
Hyperlink To Top Of Page
Daggit Button Four
Battlestar Galactica Daggit With Rotating Ears
Oot Of Sight Bar
RSS Feed
Mail
Amelia
Blindsided Box - Crazy On The Outside

Directed By - Tim Allen

CRAZY ON THE OUTSIDE

Starring - Tim Allen, Sigourney Weaver, Jeanne Tripplehorn & Julie Brown

Released Into Society - January 8th, 2010

Directed By - Mira Nair

AMELIA

Starring - Hilary Swank, Richard Gere & Ewan McGregor

Vanished From Theaters - Late November, 2009 (Exact Date Unknown)

Amelia Movie Poster Hilary Swank

During an attempt to circumnavigate the globe, Earhart disappeared over the central Pacific Ocean, on July 2nd, 1937. Over seventy years later, we can clearly see that her ass had been missing for an unknown amount of time prior to that fatal flight.

Amelia's rigid, unnatural posture suggests the onset of rigor mortis. Two-time Oscar winner, Hilary Swank, who is known and respected for taking things too far, accepted the role on the condition that she be allowed to portray Earhart as dead throughout the film.

Amelia 90 Degree Angle Bar


Ass
Elevation

90º

Amelia Ass Arrow
Amelia 90 Degree Angle Bar

Judging by Sigourney Weaver's face, the props people have invented a
form of glass that takes 30 years off anyone standing behind it.

Even if the film tanks, I think the glass will be a huge commercial success.

Crazy On The Outside Movie Poster Sigourney Weaver

I was quite moved when I realized that Tim Allen is actually trying to prevent his fellow actors from being in "another crap Tim Allen movie." And he's directing it.

Robin Williams has never been been this selfless.

Crazy On The Outside B

When the title of a comedy comes in the form of a rubber stamp, it's a kind of guarantee the movie will suck ass. Remember "Accepted" or "Next Day Air"?
Neither do I.

The only known exception to this rule is "Top Secret" (1984).

Sigourney Weaver Close Up
Crazy On The Outside C
Crazy On The Outside A
Hyperlink To Top Of Page
Hyperlink To Top Of Page

HalfManHalfMovie.com is not
intended for readers under 18 years of age

HalfManHalfMovie.com
Created by John Carroll © 2010 to Present

Blindsided Footer - Max The Car With Streetwalker
"GODDAMNIT MAX!
MICE, BIRDS... maybe A SQUIRREL.
ENOUGH WITH THE STREETWALKERS."
Out Of Sight Glow Bar
Oot Of Sight Bar Out Of Sight Glow Bar